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I’m turn a baby down I’ma bust a coach’s head open on some diddy if he ever talk to my son like an idiot One time for a really gettin’ it two times cause we got the whole city lit Impregnate bridget soon as she have a baby she gon’ make another nigga Got the food in islam and the trenches hah even though they know yeezus is a Christian hah She spent her whole check on some christians and that girl ain’t even religious Walkin’ lmn’ breathin’ girl you know my past well hard to believe in God your nigga get killed Blac chyna trying rob help him with the weight I wish my trainer would tell me what I overate so when I’m on vacay I need to kick back want a boss or an R&B nigga with a six pack ABC Classic FM I need every bad chick up in equinox I need to know right now if you a freak or not I need every bad girl up in equinox I need to know right now if you a freak or not I need every bad girl up in equinox I want to know right now if you a freak or not I need every bad girl up in equinox I want to know right now if you a freak or not Oh lord, oh lord I need every bad girl up in equinox I want to know right now if you a freak or not I need every bad girl up in equinox I want to know right now if you a freak or not Oh lord, oh lord New York City! ABC Classic FM Eight times! The most of all time! It’s “weekend update” with Colin jost and Michael che. What’s up, everybody. Welcome to “Weekend Update” I’m Michael che. And I’m Colin Jost. And here are tonight’s top stories. The gop debate just ended. In South Carolina and Donald trump was repeatably booed. Throughout the evening. Here’s a quick clip. Of trump responding to jeb bush. Jeb is so wrong. He’s absolutely The crazy thing is, all jeb said was, it’s great to be here in South Carolina. Don’t you guys know you can’t boo Donald trump. He doesn’t hear boos. If you boo Donald trump in his head, it’s just this. Jeb is so wrong. Jeb is absolutely so At the Democratic debate, ABC Classic FM and Bernie Sanders made concerted efforts to appeal to AfricanAmerican voters. One a lot more than the other. At the end of that debate, Hillary pulled hot sauce out of her bag. This week, Bernie Sanders met with the reverend Al sharpton at Sylvia’s restaurant in Harlem, and let’s just say they did not tip well. During the Democratic debate, Hillary Clinton attacked Bernie Sanders saying he needs to be honest with voters about the difficulty of accomplishing his proposals, while Clinton’s critics say she has to be honest with voters about All that stuff. And then there’s Oh, wow, there’s more. Okay. She’s got to be honest about that stuff. Donald trump promised this week he will stop using profanity and other vulgar language on the campaign trail. Saying as we get closer, you’ll be shocked how presidential I’ll be. Adding you’ll love it so much you’ll cream your jeans. This week Beyonce faced outrage for her super bowl performance. No, she didn’t. When did outrage go from pitchforks and torches to strongly worded tweets. Even if you were outraged, what are you going to do, stop listening to Beyonce? Impossible. She’s too good, she’s like the Beyonce of music. And the better you are at something, the more you can get away with. You know, not long ago, there was an actual petition to kick Justin bieber out of the country just for being a horrible person. Then we heard that song sorry and said, oh, man you can stay. ABC Classic FM People got bad when kanye tweeted Billy cosby is innocent this week. But my first thought was damn, kanye’s new album must be dope. And it is. When you’re that dope you can whatever you want. My grandmother is the most prejudice person we know and we all ignore it. Why? Because she’s the Beyonce of sweet potato pie. This month nbc will air a special that features a reunion of the cast of friends, here to comment is Rachel from friends. This is incredible. It’s so great to see you, Rachel. Oh, Colin, hi, hi. ABC Classic FM Oh, hi, hi. Oh, wow yeah. You know, I don’t think I’ve seen you since the ‘s. How have you been? Oh, what? Yeah, yeah, I’ve been I’ve been good. I’ve been good. Yeah. Good. So are you excited to see all your friends again? Oh, yeah, Joey, Chandler, phoebs, mon, and of coarse Ross. Yeah. Yeah, that’s all of them. You know, I’m seeing them tonight. Phoebs is playing a show at central perk and then we’re all jumping in a fountain with umbrellas. You should come. I’ll see you there. Okay, yeah. Okay, bye. I’m sorry, what just happened? Oh, yeah, you know, that happens to me every few minutes. Yeah, yeah, it’s weird. I don’t know, it’s weird. Speaking of which. Hey, what’s that? What’s what? That? Well, that’s Michael che. She’s on “friends” she’s never seen a black person, Colin. Oh, yeah, hey, why don’t you both come over tonight. Phoebs is going to bring her new boyfriend. And he’s not going to fit in. I’ll see you there. Yeah. ABC Classic FM Oh, shhhh. Wait, now you have a baby? Oh, yeah, sometimes, yeah. Take him. Rachel, is it me or do you always sound surprised by everything? What? Oh, yeah, no. Okay. Okay? What? Yeah? Huh? Rachel from “friends.” Okay. At a rally in Baton Rouge this week, Donald trump signed the hand of a toddler, the message read sweetly and simply, deport me. ABC Classic FM

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