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Why, yes, yes. I gave them a heavy assignment for the weekend. I thought I’d better let them get to the library before it closed But the library is open until : tonight. 😕 Oh, yes, so it is. Yes. Hard to keep up with these new rules. That rule’s been in effect ever since . But no matter. I’m glad I ran across you. I want to invite you for cocktails this evening in my lodgings. Oh, how nice. I want you and the other members of the faculty to meet a new colleague. Oh, Professor Fenster? Oh, then you’ve met? No, no. Oh, well, in that case, may we expect you at 😕 Oh, yes, yes, indeed. Yes, sir. Excellent. Splendid. Oh, and, Professor? Yes, Dean. Don’t work too hard. Zotz! Amazing. Uncle Jonathan. Better hurry if you’re going to make that cocktail party at :. Yeah. Would you get me that package on my bureau, darling? What’s in it? Oh, just some things I bought downtown. Thank you. I won’t be here when you get back, so don’t wait up. You have a date? Uh-huh. Jimmy. Jimmy who? Jimmy Kellgore. He’s not much, but he’ ll do till Eddie gets home. Jimmy Kellgore! Horatio Kellgore’s boy? Yes. Oh, it’s not serious or anything like that. It’s just a date. Not a date, date. But Kellgore’s son. Oh, Jimmy’s all right. Kind of a wolf, but I can handle him. Zotz! Zotz! Zotz! You’d better hurry, Uncle Jonathan. All right, I’m coming. Cynthia, baby. Well, are you all ready to go? Anytime you are. Okay. Ah, Professor Jones. How nice of you to come. Will you have a martini? Oh, no, thank you, sir. Uh, I don’t suppose you have any sauerkraut juice? Why, no, I don’t think. Uh, my . Persephone? Yes? Do we happen to have any sauerkraut juice? Sauerkraut juice? I don’t think so. Oh, perhaps we could get you a soft drink, Professor? That would be fine, Mrs. Updike. Take Hercules for a moment, please, Joshua. And get rid of that pipe. You know it makes Hercules ill. There we are. Thank you, Mrs. Updike. Get rid of that pipe Uh, yes, thanks. Will you take Hercules? Thank you so much. Professor, if you only knew how much the dean and I admire your abstinence from strong drink, your sensible diet, your devotion to exercise. As the ancients said, Mens sana in corpore sano. Oh, yes, indeed. I think of you as one of the great and classic educators of yore. Plato, Aristotle, in flowing robes, stately, sober, dignified. Roaming the groves of academe, dispensing wisdom and knowledge. And now, please come and meet the new member of our faculty. Professor Fenster, I’d like you to meet Professor Jonathan Jones ancient Eastern languages. Glad to meet you, Professor Jones. I . Charmed. Joshua. Yes, my dear. Please take Hercules. Yes, a pleasure. There we are. Now you’ll excuse me, please. Oh, certainly. Yes. Of course. By George, that’s a beautiful cat. Yes, isn’t it? He loves strangers. Would you like to hold him? Uh . Dean? Let me get this straight. You are Professor Fenster? Well, my friends call me Virginia. And to think you’re the famous Jonathan Jones. Oh, well, not so famous. Not so famous? Why, everybody in the field is familiar with your doctorate thesis on the transmutation of the Latin “F” to “B” in Teutonic languages. Well, that was quite a while ago. And I simply devoured your latest book. Really? The Semantics of Dionysius of Halicarnassus? Yes. I could hardly put it down. Well. But I thought your field was modern languages, like Professor Kellgore’s. Oh, well, it is. Oh. But I’ve also studied ancient Eastern languages. Like me. Like you. I see. Very interesting. Very. Uh, tell me, of these two specialties, Professor Fenster . Virginia. Virginia. Of these two specialties, Virginia, which will you utilize here? Well, I wish I knew. The dean told me I was to prepare myself for either course. He said he has an important decision to make. But really, Professor Jones . Jonathan. Jonathan. Really, I think it’s so fascinating to meet the author of those wonderful books. You can teach me so much. I warn you, you’re going to see a lot of me. Yes, well, I’ve already seen a lot of you, Virginia. You were going to forget all about that, remember? Ah, forgive me.

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